ENDLESS SLEEP

© Gloria Smith 2015

Long after I'm gone I will love on

Don't think me gone for I will come
Once more to you my one true love
Who was so faithful and so brave
Whose kindness you so freely gave
My Words will haunt your heart
Will reach to you from out the dark
And endless sleep of human frame
Your heart has but to call my name
In my repose perchance my prose 
Will yet bespeak my endless love
And Angels bear upon their wings
My voice again to softly sing 
Within the gentle springtime breeze
That stirs the Weeping Cherry tree
A lilting ballad of Faith renewed
And of my sacred love for you

PAIN

You take a "pain pill" -- funny wording that... like you're taking a pill to "cause pain." smirk
Then pretty soon your body gets used to the dose and it only takes the edge off the pain. Severe, chronic, debilitating pain cannot be understood unless it is experienced.
So you increase the dose just a little and then some more because you can't sleep, you can't rest; you're totally worn out. The bottle says every 6 hours. You wait for the six hours to be over. You watch the clock.
It's not long until you're taking the "pill for pain" every 4 hours, maybe every 3 hours. It depends on how well you can tolerate the agony. 
You call the Doctor. He increases the dose. "Nothing more can be done." says the Nurse with a jaded concern in her voice. You hear the unspoken thought. She wonders if you're an addict. She hasn't had long-term unrelenting pain. That's obvious and she's seen way too many addicts. It's understandable.
No... you are not an addict. Not yet and by God's grace you never will be but how do you survive this pain? No one has an answer.
You smile in public. You can't writhe upon your bed there. You can't moan and hold yourself. You smile and sit as still as possible in your chair. You smile and answer politely and do things as normally as possible. You walk as quickly as your body will allow and try not to hate the thing you live in that is full of abject misery.
And... you... Smile. 

GLOAMING

The Gloaming sits upon the Sky

It's calling out to you and I

To tell the glorious day Good-Bye

Come out to play with the stars so high

MOON GLOW

© Gloria Smith 2012

Moon Glow... luminous night light
Soft, silent haze burns lilting streams
Of soft spun music in my mind
And memories left behind
Come waltzing back to rest inside 
Oh lovely dreams I will have
This bright moonlit night of spectral light 
Life it seems is kind this eve
I find no cause to grieve
While endless moonbeams stream
Throughout my dark and lonely room
Her perfume of contentment lingers in the air
I find myself without a care
I know no desire... no endless fire
All is peace and sweet relief
And joy rests quietly at my feet
I sleep in quiet reverie
Dreaming only of sweet retreat
From sorrow as I greet the next tomorrow...  

Tears...

Tears are oceans of feelings washing wave after wave upon my soul. Sands of time on the shores of my life. A little girl plays there gathering seashells she puts to her ear, listening for the voices of her life. 

© Gloria Smith 2012

Twitter!

Lovin' Those Blues - Sleepless Night

TO THE MOON
Art thou pale for weariness
Of climbing heaven and gazing on the earth,
Wandering companionless
Among the stars that have a different birth,
And ever changing, like a Joyless eye
That finds no object worth its constancy?

By Percy Bysshe Shelley (1792-1822)

Tatoos
Pain has transformed the ordinary
Into the extraordinary
Pain has kissed the eternal
External ecstacy reigns
Relief was sought from the God of self
The horror of the mundane! ~ Glo

I tried to forget and could not, so I forgave and would not remember... ~ Glo

Morning sails through sun kissed skies on gossamar wings born aloft by the sighs of a nighttime slowly dying and another days' dawning... 

© Gloria Smith 2011

Daylight comes through windows shut against it, as reality comes through dreams barred against it, and I come into the new day -- a chance once more to play this dangerous game of life. Shall I win? Who's to say? But you will know that I have played... ;) Glo

Solid ships on endless seas hold the night and kiss the breeze... :) Glo (written for a dear Friend)

There's no such thing as a stupid question, but they're the easiest to answer! LOL

Tell me not that you love me unless you show me... and tell me that you love me more than you show me. It's important to hear; it's important to say; it's important to show, but it's so important to truly know... ;) Glo

I thirst for music as a little sparrow perched on the edge of cold stone bird bath. I drink deeply of its cool life giving waters to soothe my parched throat; to quench this eternal ache, and then I SING -- oh God... how I sing... :) Glo

“Knowing you I can't believe that true friendship is just a dream and nobody can tell me that loving you is just my weakness.”
~ Jeff Buckley

We lead by example and sometimes those who "preach" the most fail the most miserably. Perhaps that's why they know how to preach the best sermons to the rest of us. Perhaps to pay pennance for their sin... But if we watch the simple, silent few who love and do and do not say, and yet they pay the price of sacrifice and servitude, and make the sun to shine each day in some small way. They are the Heroes of this life unseen... but there is one who sees, and in the end will lift them up, and they who have nursed their bitter cup, will drink new wine through endless time. ~ :) Glo

I will not die with my music in me only... I will die knowing that it is in you as well... I will die happy then. Thank-you for listening; for allowing me to be truly happy, for happiness is in us only when we create it in others. ~ Glo

Your voice tender and strong is the most lovely music my heart has ever heard... Loving you is the most beautiful music my heart has ever composed... I will sing my song of longing for you always. ;) Glo